I'm gunna start by getting a little deep here, I have terrible self-confidence and self esteem which I have mentioned in other posts. I know I've always compensated with my lack of self-esteem by focusing on what I wear and the way I want to look to people, but I finally realised that is damaging to my mental state and I am just so tired and fed up with feeling this way. So I sort of lost interest in blogging as I kind of started this blog as a documentation of outfits.
I decided to unfollow a lot of fashion bloggers over social media websites. I realised that looking at these gorgeous well put together woman who looked perfect was really taking a toll on how I viewed myself and putting unnecessary pressure on myself to look a certain way. Days out were over powered by an urge to put together an outfit and take pictures to blog about to be part of this community, that I had managed to drown myself in every day. I know most of these bloggers enjoy what they are doing and it makes them feel great and brings them happiness, but it doesn’t for me. I feel kind of enlightened to realise that.
What I wanted was to just relax, I want to grow out my blonde hair, I want to chuck on a t-shirt, skirt and just go. And I want to enjoy whatever I’m doing that day and just do it and not focus on what outfit I am wearing. Does any of this make sense? I hope it does. I sat and wondered why I just don’t do this….. really I had no reason.
However I don't want to loose this blog and its posts as its also serves as a great place to remember great memories from the last few years. So as of 2017 I will use this space to document memories I want to save forever and also share what makes me happy.... I may even get back to reviewing movies and other shows and books I enjoy.
On a different note last year I also went from 'yeah I like Anime' to OH MY FUCKING GOD I FELL DOWN THE RABBIT HOLE AND I CANNOT GET OUT. I have been consumed and you know what I am so happy with that.
It started way back in July I think after Hyper Japan. I’ve always been shipping boy/boy as long as I can remember. It started with Placebo back in my early teenage years, and has followed me through into adulthood. At the summer Hyper Japan (I was in full Cherik overdrive) and was busy looking for any artwork made for them when I found a Junjou Romantica art book. If you are unaware of what that is, it’s a yaoi (boy love) manga/anime. Matt bought it for me as he had seen World’s great first love (Sekai-ichi Hatsukoi) and said it was good which is set in the same universe as Junjou Romantica and we watched it when we got home.
It then exploded from there and before I knew it I was obsessed. And I am ok with that, because it bought me a lot of happiness and made me realise that actually what I was putting my energy into wasn’t bringing me happiness. So it kind of acted as a turning point for me haha!
What I love as well is it is never ending. There are so many genres and styles once you have finished an anime there are mangas and it is just never ending. I’ve absolutely fallen in love with Haikyuu!! And Yuri!!! On Ice. As well as Ten count, Free!, Love Stage, Kiss him, not me, Barkamon the list seriously just goes on and on.
Anyway, that’s a small update of why this blog has been so quiet. I have a few posts from 2016 that I want to write and update over the next 2 weeks (destination Star Trek, Placebo, Hyper Japan and Christmas)
So Happy New Year bloggers and expect to see more adventures, collectables and things that bring me a lot of happiness.
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