Good bye 2014! And a Happy New Year

It's the most wonderful time of the year!
I hope you all had a lovely Christmas, I did even though it was very different!

I haven't been very good with updating this blog in the last half a year! Work has been exceptionally busy and after my Grandpa passing away I don't think I have been much in the mood!

But as I have had rather a lot of time off over Christmas 

(still have 4 more days off woohoo) I thought I would sum up 2014!

This year has had some amazing parts & some shitty parts.Thinking about the amazing parts though!

I have the wardrobe I had dreamed of for such a long time. As I have written before I have never had the confidence to wear what I wanted and I have always felt quite restricted. This year I think was the year I really really changed. I've been really sticking to this since August 2013, and this summer with the gym and healthy eating i pushed myself past my goal weight and I am really proud of myself!

I have made some great friends at work, and I have actually enjoyed my job this year! My first job as a graphic designer I took so I could get experience, lets face it, in no way can you be picky if someone offers you a paid Graphic Design job the minute you leave Uni. It worked in my favor as I really do like my job now and all the people I work with. I have really enjoyed the last month with the Christmas Spirit, Elektra Awards and Christmas party.!

One thing I did which I was really pleased about was selling my designs. At the beginning of the year I had some necklaces made up and they were a bit of a flop. But this Christmas I had my Christmas design printed and I sold over 100 in a week! I was super pleased with myself and this year I think I will invest more in the greeting cards side of things!

I have been so excited though about Christmas coming around this year!

I booked a trip away (1 night) to LongLeat. It was just in a travel lodge and to see the festival of lights, I got an amazing deal on Tesco for Longleat and the hotel was super cheap as I booked it back in September!

The rest of the post is pretty image heavy so see below to continue reading!

The perfect dress

I found the perfect dress. I really did and I am so pleased with it! I wanted to get something perfect for my Grandpa’s funeral. I wanted it to be something that he would of gone, ‘yes I like that a lot!’

I have black clothes, but all of them have been for work and although I have a few smart dresses (all have patterns on of some sort) it just didn’t feel special enough… All the items that would have been ok to wear I only own because I had to get them for work so I never really liked any of them like I do my own clothes.

So I ordered a dress online and I wasn’t blown away by it… Matt suggested we went and had a look so last Friday after work, very reluctantly as I was exhausted we headed off to Lakeside. I actually ended up having a lovely evening. It was one of those shopping trips that ended up being really productive and satisfying and I kind of wish we could do it again tonight but there would just be no point.

I got some cardi’s from Forever 21, upon getting home I realised the black one was much shorter than the other two I got and was a little bummed out about that, then I also realised my blue had a hole in it at work on that Friday so I thought ohh good both of those can go back.

We also tried the new KFC pulled chicken burger. It wasn’t great.

We had a long mooch around forever 21, but that shop is just not made for people of my height. Then we came out of there and Matt convinced me to go to House of Fraser, even though I insisted I  couldn’t afford it! At the back as I almost gave up in there we spied a Yumi section (I do love Yumi dresses) I had spotted a Yumi dress online but it was £50 alas…. It was only £48 in store and then Matt found a card that said 20% off for students! Yay having my sisters student card! So I tried it on and I have to say it was perfect. Its not plain but the detailing on it is subtle and is just so elegant and feels lovely and feels like a dress my Grandpa would be proud of. We ended up getting it for £38, which although was more that I wanted to spend as I am trying to save up, it was worth every penny.

(please excuse the glum bum face)

I just thought it was gorgeous, and I am so glad Matt made me get it! I am dreading Tuesday no and at the same time looking forward to it being over with. The idea that it will all be very final and real upsets me but it must be done and at least I will feel  like my Grandpa would be proud of me!

I’m going to pair it with my TUK heels and a little black bag so hopefully I will look the business!

At least it is the weekend now, because I feel like I need to sleep I am do drained at the moment!

On a more exciting note, I have finally reached my ultimate goal! I have lost exactly 6stone altogether and 4 stone since I started myfitnesspal! I’m now done with my diet and im going to start to find a routine to maintain this weight! I’m proud of myself and this also doesn’t really feel real but fingers crossed I can keep as this weight!

My weird relationship with coats.

I’m going to write a more cheery post today. The funeral is booked for 16^th September so a week on Tuesday. I feel very much like I am in a limbo type place. Not really sad, because I haven’t said goodbye yet but not quite right as I know the time to say goodbye is coming.

But I thought I would do a little post update anyhow. So I wanted to share my new coat. I have a real issue with coats. Last year I bought 3 D:

THREE coats it was ridiculous. The problem was is I rushed in a bought one that didn’t fit that great; I then rushed in again and bought another one I wasn’t 100% sure about. These were mistakes as, as I have learnt I should only buy something if I am 110% happy with it and how it fits. I then bought one from ASOS in January, again I was never 110% sure although this fitted well the material ended up being very uncomfortable, there was also no fur on the hood which is something I really wanted and it was probably a little too big as when I tried it on again this year it I am swimming in it.

Actually it was technically 4 coats ahah, but I got a really fancy Hell Bunny coat for my birthday but this is a special fancy going out coat which I plan on making sure I wear much more this winter!

Anyhow, I was going to try and make do but then I saw one in topshop and just fell in love. I decided to get it as a birthday gift. This was back at the beginning on August and as it was selling out in a size 14 quite quickly from what I saw I picked one up and popped it on my credit card and it has sat in my room for now just in case I spied a better one when the autumn winter clothes were realised.

I popped to pick up a dress I had ordered from new look for the funeral and on my way in a spied another coat that caught my attention. I thought no no I won’t try this one I have mine, its much nicer but then I though ahh maybe I’ll have a quick look. I put it on and the fit was just perfect, it made me realise that perhaps the topshop one may not fit as well as I would of liked. It zips up rather than big buttons at the top so I have more breathing room in it and an option to unzip it slightly I get too hot. The fur is very impressive (although not as nice as the topshop coat). I decided to buy it take it home and compared it. On first glance I thought no, no the topshop one is much much nicer, and I still feel this way on first look when it’s on a hanger, but then when I put it on the New Look one just looked so much nicer. It hangs nicely much more fitted and complementing, it’s longer and the zip feature is great much better and more comfortable than buttons that only do up round my neck. Much as I adore the topshop one I thought, no, I have to go with the more comfortable one because that really does make or break it for me, and I DO NOT want to end up not wearing it again. The other thing that played at the back of my head was that it wouldn’t look so great with hoodys and more casual looks whereas this other one I think would go nicely with dresses and hoodys and even my PJ bottoms when I go to tesco :p

SO the first coat is going back. I feel like this is meant to be as I only have a few more days left to return the first one!

Anyway that was very long winded but I am very excited to wear my coat now, and I’m welcoming the cooler weather (after my birthday as I can’t have it until then)

Excuse the terrible photos!

TopShop Coat

New Look Coat

And then I also found a little gem on Saturday. We popped into Redhil so I could get a vest top. Walking past a shop called Street Talk I spied a dress in the window. Now street talk was where I bought my angry grunger stuff when I was a teenager so I was surprised to be buying something so delicate and lovely in there. I went in found it and tried it on. Little disappoint there was only a S/M but thought it looked like quite a large small medium so I tried it on and it fitted like a glove. It very quickly came home with me! I know what I will be wearing when I go the weekend before France. As you can see it is covered in little birds and palm trees!

Anyway coat caffle done with, I am now very happy and I am also very glad it is Friday!

My Grandpa.

I am going to attempt to write this post in one sitting, but we shall see how it goes I guess.

On the bank holiday weekend my Grandpa was taken into hospital with internal bleeding. He was been pretty ill now for over 2 years. Things seemed quite dire at one point and there was talk of serious ops and all sorts. Being the medical mystery my Grandpa is he managed to get better and on the following Saturday (less than a week after he went in) he came home with recovery on the horizon. I didn’t worry too much as I know he is a strong man and he just wanted to get home!

However this Sunday I woke up to a phone call from my mum. He had passed away that morning after he came home. By the sounds of it, it was exceptionally quick and I am just happy he got to go home and have his pipe and his beer. He got to spend the night watching countdown with my Grandma and he was at home, his home he had lived at for I believe almost 40 years.

My Grandpa was a very kind man, he was also exceptionally smart I always used to tell people that he was the most intelligent person I knew and I looked up to him a lot. He had a naughty sense of humour and every time you gave him a kiss hello or goodbye you got bristles scratching your face and a damp cheek from where he smoked his pipe something I will dearly miss. I have so many fond memories of him as he was such a character he did things his own way I know that when the pain of losing him eases when we are together as a family there will be hours of laughter when we remember back to some of the eccentric stories we have of him.

I have never lost a close relative, and the feeling is just as bad if not worse than I had imagined. The last two days I have been very teary going from getting on with life and then have a good weep or sob. Today I am exhausted and I don’t think I would even have the energy to cry anymore, which scares me as it’s only been 3 days since he has passed. If I feel this awful now how will I feel in two weeks’ time?

My Grandma is very much in my mind at the moment. She is being looked after and supported by the family, but she has lost her world really. Almost 65 years they were together, and I loved to watch them banter and talk. You could always see this love between them that never faded ever even when my Grandpa was winding people up with his teasing!

So I’ll end it with Rest in Peace Grandpa. I want you to know that I am grateful you were in my life as I grew up and I always admired you and looked up to you. You will always be the big strong exceptionally intelligent man I remember and I will continue to tell people about you proudly as I feel sorry that they never got to know you. It will never be the same without you ever. But thank you for the love and all the generosity that you gave and I hope that one day I will see you again.

Love Toria

Last bank holiday weekend of 2014 done and dusted

This weekend was nice in some ways and not so nice in other ways. We had 4 whole days off which was pretty nice. I’ve tried to space my holidays well this year. A week off at the end of June and a week off at the end of September, and I just found out today that Matt has had his Christmas holiday approved. I’m so excited about that as from the 19^th December I will be off until the 2^nd January as long as my holiday is approved but I can’t see why it wouldn’t be! That is 13 whole days off in a row (only 6 being holiday days so yay) I am so crazy over Christmas I seriously cannot wait! I really feel like this year will be a really good one!

I was feeling pretty meh about the summer coming to an end as I was rather enjoying it so! But now we have had about two weeks of cooler weather and about a years’ worth of rain in the last 2 days I think that I am feeling a little more accepting of the autumn that is fast approaching (only 4 more days left until it’s officially here). Slowly the jumpers and warmer clothes are creeping into the shops and I couldn’t help myself but try a few pieces on! Both are from Debenhams (blue one is Red Herring and the Grey one is H! by Henry Holland)

So I am a little more excited about the seasons changing although not so much about this wet weather we have had. I got this rain mac 2 weeks ago after a very long painful relationship with it haha! I ordered it back in the spring/summer and it came and was too big so I sent it back and never ordered a replacement as I was racked with guilt (moneywise). I then reordered two sizes the 12 fitted better but the sleeves were too sort and then I decided £35 was just way too much for it and both went back. Then they slashed the price to £17! I spent all morning torn whether to order it AGAIN! I ended up ordering 3 macs all in the sale and annoyingly enough I kept the pink one I had been debating with for soo long ahah! I’m terrible sometimes at make a decision, I think it is the fact we are saving all our money at the moment I didn’t want to waste it!

But here it is in all its glory and it is great, it is actually completely water proof and it’s darn comfortable, I just wish it was more portable, but then I would most likely lose the water proofness of it that way!

So anyhow, I am trying to save up hence why the jumpers are just on my wish list at the moment. I would like to have a few for winter so we shall see I guess. I did pick up 3 cardigans in Forever 21 the other day (I returned the asda ones in previous post) as the the forever21 ones were much nicer and I got 3 for less than the price of two!

I also thought I’d mention the fact that I am getting rather into Anime at the moment! We watched Toradora a few weeks ago and I fell in love. We are watching Clannad now and I also have Black Butler going along side that too! There have been a few more Matt has got me to watch but I can’t remember what they are called but I enjoyed those too. Tonight I plan to get in make dinner (as I am starving marvin) and watch back to back Clannad. We gave in last night and ordered pizza hut. To be honest way too much pizza hut and I ended up with a pretty lame stomach ache. I’m not used to eating that much food especially when it is that greasy too lol. So chicken, mash and some veg I think my body will be appreciated of it! All this Anime watching is getting me even more excited about MCM now at the end of October!

It's getting sooo cool outside!

Well summer has left us! I am hoping it will be back and will grace us with its warmth again for maybe a couple more weeks. ‘Arctic winds will plunge parts of Britain into the coldest spell of August weather for almost a century - just in time for the late summer Bank Holiday.’

It has been a bit of a shock to go from 20°c+ to about 12°c. There is a really bitter cold feeling in the air! I have struggled all week to get out of bed as I have been FREEZING and been wondering around wrapped up in a blanket refusing to get out of it for those few moments where you are all exposed to the world. I suppose I should suck it up because it will just get colder from here on in as August is fast coming to an end, so autumn will soon be on our door steps.

With this sudden chill in the air it got me thinking about some warmer clothes. This summer I have been happy in a t-shirt and a skirt or shorts for my more casual wear. I love my dresses the most but I like to have a selection of casual clothes, not much fun putting on a fancy dress to sit in bed all day, or go to Tesco..and hoodys are the best for evenings at the cinema!

My style over the last year has changed a fair amount. I wanted to wear jumpers and what not this year but to be honest I can’t find any I suit, and not to mention I feel quite uncomfortable in them! :(

So I think this winter I will stick to my new hoody (that fits well rather than a big cover up) and I also invested in some cardigans for chucking over my t-shirts!

I actually came up with a pretty cute school girl look with some cardigans!

I think they are pretty cute little outfits that will look nice before the winter actually comes around. Means I don’t have to put my t-shirts away completely till next summer :)

I am a bit strange with clothes. It’s a bit of a control thing I like to have everything planned and ready to go. I like to know exactly what I am going to wear through summer or winter or whatever season and I also like to have a style kind of and stick to that. Hence why I end up with same clothes in lots of different colours!

But as I said above I do hope we see a few more warmer weeks before autumn comes completely, hopefully a few more shorts and sandals days!

I’m getting excited about heading off to France soon. Just wish I had a better idea of the weather as that would be very helpful as I LOVE TO PACK and plan to pack but at the moment it is hard to plan as I have no idea what the weather will do! I’m hoping for cool dry days maybe 15°c to 20°c that would be spot on thank you very much!

I have also started a birthday list bwahah, currently it involves a coat from my Mum and Dad (yes I have a coat problem, but I SWEAR this will be the only one I get this year and I will sell at least one old one!) and some shoes from my sister. I know it’s a bit early but the shoes were in the sale and I couldn’t afford them as I am saving saving saving and the coat was just sooo lovely I couldn’t leave it behind heh he!

This week is a short week and so is next week as I took Friday off and it is bank holiday Monday too. So two 4 day weeks and a 4 day weekend yay! Let’s hope today goes quickly and it is Thursday evening before I know it!

Quiet few weeks gone by and a head!

So life has not been overly exciting

I knew August would be a fairly dull month for me as we don’t have anything planned. We didn’t even go to the cinema this weekend, shock horror! There was just nothing we wanted to see playing so we decided to give it a miss. Matt however went and did airsoft! I was really proud of him, it can be real intimidating going somewhere you don’t know on your own with a group of strangers. He said he had a great day and wants to go again! So I am really pleased about that. However he looks like he has chicken pox with all the welts on his legs and midriff! Ouch. I spent the day on my own pottering around and doing house stuff, like tidying and the washing. Pretty boring but had to be done.

I have actually booked the 22^nd of August off and I am looking forward to a 4 day weekend yay! If Matt can get the time off I want at Christmas I still have 2 days to use somewhere and if not I will have a whole week off to use somewhere… not used to having actual holiday to use. I hope he gets the time off at Christmas because that means we will have 13 odd days off together, a whole 2 weeks almost :D fingers crossed he can.

As for holidays I am VERY much excited about going to France now. I am actually getting a slight autumnal feel…. I am not ready to say good bye to summer yet, but the shops are swapping shorts for coats and the nights and morning are DEFFINTLY getting cooler. But I am honestly enjoying summer this year and I don’t want it to end yet!! Not until mid-September anyway!

I started getting all my little bottles of stuff ready for my suitcase, I am also excited at the fact you can take two bags onto the plane now, so I don’t have to fart ass around mashing it into my case. I did look up times though and realised we have around a 4am start D: 4 FREAKING AM…… We have Euro Gamer on the Saturday so I am thinking maybe making myself get up at 7am on Sunday so I can fall asleep around 7pm to get up at 4am CHRIST that is soo early hahah! But it will be worth it when we are in France! Yay!

I have however been slightly more productive this last few weeks and I have got two designs up online! I have one for my pure excitement and joy of summer! Ice scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream.

I also finished this squirrel one that has gotten me in the mood for autumn! Cooler days and darker nights! Although I dread dropping Matt at the station in the dark again boo that sucks.

The bank holiday weekend though we are seeing Doctor who in the cinema, and we are also seeing both Sin City films in the cinema…. Pretty stoked about these. Then it’s only a matter of weeks until we have some time off yay!

I hope the rain clears up here and I can get some more of that vitamin D!

Hyper Japan 2014

This weekend has indeed been a busy one! I will start briefly with a friend of mine Jenna and her fiancé Mike. They opened up their own comic book shop and we went down at on Saturday. It is a really beautiful shop and it was rammed in there! I really hope they do amazing! They had some guest there too and I got my photo with a Dalek!

Then on Sunday we had tickets for Hyper Japan. We’ve never been before and talked about going last year but didn’t. This year however Matt has really gotten in to Japanese stuff and Manga and Anime, so we went. It was only £24 for 2 day tickets which I thought was pretty cheap. For all the other conventions I go to, I know to get there as early as possible as the queues can wrap around the building so we planned to get there for 8:30ish and the doors opened at 9:30.

I got up at 6am!! Which is a crazy time for a Sunday morning and got ready. We didn’t actually have to leave until 7:15 at the latest but I ended up being ready by about 6:30am oops. After being late for comic con I took no chances but I was ill then so I think they had a big part to play in my lateness.

We stopped of course at Clapham for our pretzel and got to the venue for 8:30am. The queue however was tiny!! I think next time we can get up a little later and get there for about 9:30-10am!

We got in pretty much bang on 9:30, they had a much better system than LFCC and it was much smoother. The hall was fab there were many stalls but there was tones of room to walk in-between them. The first thing I spotted upon entering was TOTORO! So I ran over like an excited school girl and got my photo taken with him!

We then ended up going to 3 talks in a row. The first was a little strange and was a Secret Ninja, the next was a pretty cool robot talk and then the third was a software called Vocaloid which meant they could make music with human voices with humans! They mixed this with a traditional puppet performance and previewed an exclusive 30minute film using it. I will admit I did not know what was going on but it was really cool!

We then literally ran for food as we were so hungry! We had NO IDEA what we were ordering and joined a queue that were selling noodles as we knew what noodles were! We picked noodles that came with dough ball things and prawns. I have to admit that the price was pretty steep for the amount you got £14 for two. Then it didn’t help that we did not like the noodles very much at all, but we were so hungry we ate it all!

Next we just went round and had a look at all the stalls. I have to say I was a little disappointed (although don’t take that as it made the day any less enjoyable!) there weren’t as many stalls as I thought and not that may manga stalls for Matt. I thought it would be a little more like comic con stalls. They had lots of individual sellers too but the stuff was very ‘cute’ and pink and a little too cute for my taste!

However I did have a great time, and the atmosphere was great and we stayed from 9:30 till 5pm and the time flew by!  I also got some pictures with other cute characters! No for a picture spam!!

Domo came out to say hi! and had a photo opportunity which of course I got excited over

This Panda was sooo cute and I wanted to take him home. 

You can see how excited I was by him haha!

I wore my space dress (it actually fits perfectly now) 

I got Matt to snap a picture of it!

Me and Matt waiting for the talks to start!

I had a great day out and I think will go again next year. I think MCM is going to be the bigger one for us this autumn for Matt to get his Manga stuff, but I would say it is definitely worth going to Hyper Japan! There were a lot of traditional culture bits than I thought and I really enjoyed that too! There were also some BEAUTIFUL cosplayers… less than I thought but there were some amazing dresses and wigs!

We were home by 6pm and got a Dominos on the way home which was a bargain (any size £6.99) and that was just delicious! Now much to my dismay it’s Monday and now I have a quiet August

Nothing much now until September/October!

27^th September is Euro Gamer 29^th September off to France 18^th October is LFCC Winter and 25^th October is MCM! So that is a busy month to look forward to!

Hope this week goes quickly so I can sleep all weekend as today I am KNACKERED!

Body Confidence my thoughts and myths and facts.

Every summer comes and I dread it. It comes and I know I will be battling through the summer sun in too many clothes because GOD FORBID I didn't not cover up. I would wear leggings and skirt and tops. For years I would have a hoody on and give in when it got too hot and wear a short sleeved one when it got too hot. Last year I braved wearing cardigans instead. I never really enjoyed the freedom that I wish I could enjoy in summer.

I thought that’s it next summer I will lose weight and I will be summer ready (took a few summers ahah). I will be bare legged and just in a t-shirt and it will be amazing. To a BIG surprise to me it didn't happen. I may of lost around 50lbs. I’m 2-3 clothes sizes smaller. I have clothes now that I want and more or less everything I want and the styles I like fit me now! But getting my arms and legs out wasn't an easy transaction as I thought it would be.

I decided I would never be ready to go bare legged and instead focused on my top half. I just started with t-shirts. That is a nice in-between I thought, nice and cool without having all the top of my arms out and the added bonus of not getting horrendously sun burnt again. I started off around the house and little trips like to my Grandma’s and to too the super market. It was harder than I thought and now looking back I don’t know what I was so hung up on it!

I eventually realised no one was looking or staring or poking fun at me, actually no one cared and I started to notice people outside in hoody’s in the heat far more than anyone just wearing a damn t-shirt! I had to wonder if they too were insecure.

Then when we went on holiday I longed to have the holiday feeling, not be cramped up in leggings and what not. So on the first day I braved on some skin coloured tights…. I went to Morrions and to my surprise the world didn't end, no one looked or stared and actually maybe I just had regular legs. SO I decided to have skin coloured legs all holiday. Unfortunately my tights ripped that night and could either do ripped tights or just go o’natural. I did however have some biker style shorts from ASOS and I put them on instead. Matt said there was little difference between them and tights so I went with it! I walked along the beach and it felt amazing! Again no one really looked and the world didn't end and I felt less stupid than when I was down at the seaside in my leggings!

Anyway as I was away and ‘free’ on holiday I was fine and I even found myself wishing for smaller legs but correcting myself into wishing for more confidence. I know that is something I can change, why would I focus on something that I cannot. When it came to doing on the way home and going through lakeside I quickly felt very uncomfortable and changed my mind alas. But it was a big step in the right direction!

So the last few weeks I've been debating how much I want to go bare legged for the summer, how much I loved it on holiday. I don’t really like the layered up effect of leggings and I just want to do it so much. The only thing in my way is in my head! But my head is a powerful thing that gets in the way and stops me doing something. I know that I’m not huge and I know that my legs are just legs and to be honest anyone that doesn't like my legs can go stick it! But it’s easier said than done to get over that.

Finally though yesterday I went to the cinema in my new shorts and today I’m at work with just skin coloured tights on. I’m not that fussed about doing it at work because to be honest I don’t really care what I wear but it’s been a big change in my brain. I think I just need to do these things and prove to myself that nothing bad happens and my brain is over reacting.

Rocking out with my legs out! So comfy when it's hot to go to the cinema in!

It is such a free feeling being happy and comfortable and feeling like I fit in with everyone else. I’m so fed up of planning what I wear based on how I can fit leggings and a cardigan into this outfit. Or thinking no I can’t wear that because it wouldn't work with this or that.

Instead I’ve been chucking on a t-shirt and a skirt and at the moment I seem to be sticking to tights they give me that little ‘safety’ feeling that I think I need.

I thought I would just love myself when I lost weight and in actual fact I needed to work on it and I still am but I’m getting there. These hang up I have had for years and just in the back of my mind being miserable because I bought clothes ‘I thought’ I could wear instead of what I wanted to wear is such an amazing feeling. I really am beginning to feel comfortable with myself and I’m just beaming inside! I feel very settled and not like I’m trying to constantly achieve something.

I don’t know if any of this makes sense it’s something that’s hard to express and something I don’t feel like I want to share with everyone as it is something quite personal. It also give me a lot of pride with the weight loss and also the mental changes I am making. It’s also great to not be focused on ‘when I lose weight I will be able to….’ Instead I’m just being me here and now and although I want to lose a little bit more it’s not the main goal and I realise that is not going to bring me the happiness and comfortable feeling that I have been searching for!

SO the myths of weight loss to me were when you do it, IT WILL BRING YOU HAPPINESS. The fact is that actually you need to work on you and how you see yourself! You need to realise that you are amazing and to be honest with you they are just arms and legs and EVERYONE has them! You can be happy you just have to let go of those insecurities! But again that isn’t something that disappears over night! Baby steps seem to be working well for me... one thing at a time. Now it all seems less terrifying. But through all the hard work it is sooo worth it in the end!

Buyers remorse. I have been bad at saving!

I’ve been naughty and been spending money! Which I shouldn't do because I am meant to be saving up! However some of it is a little justified. I thought I would get through summer and make do with my old clothes but when you have a new ‘you’ and clothes that don’t fit they don’t make you feel good about yourself and I just wanted some bits for summer that I would love!

I’ll start with my shorts! I gave it and bought shorts something I would of NEVER worn this time last year. They are one of the best things I own this summer. It has been sooo hot this weekend and these are actually a godsend. They are so comfy and cool and nice to just kick back in. They were from Debenhams and much to my dismay they went in the sale shortly after I bought them but I've already had a lot of wear out of them in the last week!

The next thing is H&M t-shirts. I have sort of given up on Primark now (other than tights and knickers) their clothes I find disappointing and although their t-shirts are a few pounds less than these H&M ones the H&M ones fit sooo much better and much prefer them! I bought a navy blue one in store and liked it so much I order 2 more in grey and purple.

While hunting for the t-shirts in store I happened upon a navy hoody. None of my hoody’s fit anymore except a massive bear one that is only any good in the depth of winter. I saw this and tried it on and just loved the way it fitted. It’s so soft and very thin too so it will be perfect for summer evenings or when autumn starts to come around. I’m not a hoody fan anymore but I still love having them for casual days or trips to the cinema! Alas I do not have a picture of that at the moment!

Next is this skirt. I did buy this in store and was unsure then it went in the sale and was £7 cheaper online so I returned my store bought one and ordered the cheaper one. I worked 2 minute walk away from Debenhams so that’s no hassle, I had to size up and this looks better on me on my hips and to be honest if I wore it round my waist you would see my bottom at the back! It’s a light weight denim and I miss my old denim skirt that now just falls off of my literally! So this should be really nice to wear in the summer and will go into autumn winter too as it will go with tights!

Another Debenhams purchase is these sandals. I saw them at the beginning of the season and they were £30… bit too much when I am saving money! But last night they were reduced to £15 but I was too lazy to get outta bed to find my card to order them. Lucky I didn’t really as this morning they were reduced again to £8 and I got a further 10% off so they were £7ish!! I felt like this was meant to be! I hope they fit well!

The last piece of clothing I bought was this Tee Turtle t-shirt. I got one at MCM back in May and I was really impressed with the quality and sizing and when I saw this, this morning I scream internally and it stole my heart. My love for penguins won again! Damn.

Find the T-shirt here at Tee Turtle

Last thing I got (oh I did bulk buy some tights in primark but that’s a bit boring!) was a portable phone charger. Whenever I go to London and conventions my phones dies in the afternoon. I have to go all day only using it when I have to and it still doesn’t last. I have 4 more conventions this year and I just thought it would be worth the money (it was only £13) So yeah I HOPE that comes before Saturday as that is when Hyper Japan is and it would be a bit pointless if it doesn't come!

So yeah, I've been really naughty! But I am all set for summer now, even though the shops are starting to bring in winter coats SAY WAAA??? It's just awful! But I will continue to enjoy the sun and I will end with my summer time nails I did..... with the ice cream theme!!

Hopefully I will have some snaps of my new clothes while I enjoy the sunshine and YAY HYPER JAPAN ON SUNDAY!

Comic Con 2014

So Comic Con is over again for another year…. *weep*

You may of guessed that this is going to be a COMIC CON THEMED POST WAHEY!

I’ll started with mentioning that I haven’t been online much at all of late as I have been rather unwell all week. Last Monday I felt like I had caught a nasty head cold a colleague had. No worries I thought it is only Monday. Tuesday felt a little worse and Wednesday I felt terrible and went home. Thursday I did feel a little better but very stuffed up but was still hopeful for the weekend. However Friday I was even worse and again went home from work. I slept in the afternoon and woke up and burst into tears as I just didn’t want to go at all.

However I went to bed at 9am and woke up at 6am and made myself get ready. It took me much longer to get ready and organised and we headed off. Got our pretzel for breakfast and I had a coffee and we were there by 8:30ish. I went on a mission of a walk to find a cash machine and then we were in around 9:30 (door opened at 9am)  I did however put my new Flamingo dress on and I got sooo many compliments on it!

We had a little look around stalls and my photo shoot was at 10:25. I wanted to get the morning one as I felt so rough I didn’t know what I would look like by the afternoon. Had that done and I was super pleased with the photo! I most likely stunk of olbas oil as I had been walking round sniffing a tissue covered in it.

I am really happy with the photo though. I was so excited to meet David Hewlett, I have always said he would be one of the ultimate people I would like to meet.

We then found the photo area with the Game of Thrones, throne and I had my photo taken on that! Again I was pretty pleased with the photo I thought it looked pretty cool, even though I look a little like a puppet in the picture. Ha ha!

We then attempted to go to the stalls to find a plastic folder to put my photos in and it was soo rammed. We did find one and then we went outside to cool down a bit although at this point the sun had come out and it was baking. We went to the shop round the corner to get some water and on the way there my nose suddenly cleared (it was a fairly gross event involved me swallowing it yuck!). I suddenly felt 100x better and all the pressure in my face was gone. I was so pleased I wanted to tell the people in the shop about it ahah! I had to take painkillers all day to get the headache and crappy feeling at bay, but it was far more bearable that feeling like your face might pop any moment now.

We then headed to the Sherlock talk. We queued for about an hour and tbh we were really disappointed. The speakers were awful and we couldn’t hear a word they said or any questions asked. It was a shame and I’m VERY glad I didn’t pay for that!

After we headed out for lunch and I had a delicious salad from subway. My tummy had stared aching from all the pain killers I had been taking but some Gaviscon helped that a lot. I would have the salad from Subway again though it was really nice.

Afterwards we went and did all the stalls. It was so crammed we could barely move of see. We didn’t get much, I got some badges (to replace old ones I lost) and a print and key ring. I also got Jon Snow Pop Funko and a GoT necklace which I loved and for £5 I thought was a bargain. Matt also got a book which I’m pleased about as he usually doesn’t get anything.

I then talked myself into have a autograph with David Hewlett. I usually wouldn’t do both but he is quite a special person for me to meet and he wasn’t doing a talk so Matt talked me into it! There was about an 30-60minute wait so we went an had an ice cream and went back. Luckily we planned it perfectly as we were the LAST people to get one done.

I’m so glad and excited I did it though. His voice was going but he was really friendly and seemed so pleased to be there and meet me. He asked if I had meet many other cool people and I said tbh I was just here to meet him and then I told him that A Dog’s Breakfast was one of my favourite movies and he said it was so much fun to make and he wanted to do a second one and I said he should and he said Yes I KNOW I SHOULD :D

It’s a big thing as usually I can’t ever think of anything to say and I always wish I could!

We then poked round the stalls as it was gone 5pm now and it was getting quieter and we could have a proper look and at 6 we joined the queue for the GoT screening.

The screening was a little disappointing. There was meant to be a ‘special guest’ but they did turn up. The seats were also so small that Matt ended up in agony he said it ruined the whole day that made me a little sad. I have to say I was a little disappointed but it didn’t ruin my day at all.

The cast were quite funny but the episode they picked didn’t have them in it much so they didn’t have that much to say alas.

We then headed off and had pizza express which was lovely and we were home about midnight! It was a long day up at 6am and back at midnight!

I have post con blues a bit at the moment. I am still a little out of it as on Sunday I felt pretty rough again. I thought it was because I over did it on Saturday but Sunday night my ears started to bleed a bit again and they were blocked and I was in a lot of pain. A trip to the doctors and I have ear infection in both ears and a sinus infection. I’m on antibiotics at the moment but I’m not completely with it at the moment. I can’t wait to feel better it has been over a week now alas!

We have a 'Secret Screening' at the cinema tonight so I am looking forward to that! Luckily I feel well enough I think to do that. Well I hope so anyway!

Not looking forward to when post con blues hit but I had another amazing Comic Con and I can't wait for October to do it all again now!